MORE OR LESS COMPLEX OR DEEP ADDICTIONS WITH QUITE SIMILAR ORIGINS…
… but they all have points in common: when we detect them, we can find hidden causes that contain the secret to the solution.
There has always been some kind of addiction in humanity. The reasons are many and very complex. From existential dissatisfaction, the need to escape, the search for meaning, physical and emotional relief, childhood traumas, or the need to draw attention from or to punish others, and even the lack of love.
Addiction is something that cannot be quit. Even if you are determined, you cannot quit. According to this definition, breathing is an addiction, as eating, sleeping are other addictions. But the meaning refers to those things that are not natural for the body or for the life and wellbeing of an individual.
For example: alcohol, drugs or substances, toxic relationships, tobacco, gambling, compulsive buying, overeating, working without rest, winning and accumulating money, etc. But there are other psycho-emotional addictions, such as: addiction to a mother and / or father, to children, to a partner, to sex, to the past, to suffering or pain, to repeating patterns, to resentment or to not wanting to forgive, to criticizing or judging; and we cannot forget addiction to screens and the Internet.
In the end all addictions produce some kind of slavery and dependency, loss of enjoyment of life, forgetting oneself, distraction, waste of time and money, guilt, self-destruction…
But it is also true that every addiction brings enormous benefits which are usually very hidden and difficult to recognize. These benefits are often so old and concealed that they are very difficult to detect.
Other addictions that go unnoticed but that are much more complicated are addiction to beliefs, to thoughts, and of course, to identity…
Identity is the greatest of all addictions. We do not want to stop seeing ourselves as we see ourselves or how others see us. We cling to what we believe we are, trapped in the prison of what others think of us, chained to a false idea of what we learned to perceive about what we are.
These multiple identifications drown the authenticity of what we are. We identify with what we have, with what we do, with what we eat, what we consume, with what we think, with what we believe. All these masks completely take over each and every decision we make.
So if we want to resolve any kind of addiction, we need to get to the core of what we believe we are. Because if we cannot let go of the idea of who we are, we will never be able to solve an addiction from the root. We can force ourselves to leave an addiction, compel ourselves to overcome an addiction, but healing from addiction happens when it leaves us, as it no longer serves any purpose in our life.
In order for that to happen, it is necessary to recover the authentic sense of life because with sense there is meaning, and with meaning there is purpose, which comes from the deepest and most sincere part of the heart.
Those who overcome addictions from the root do not recognize having been as they were. It is as if they saw a fiction or horror film when they look back, because they realize that they were immersed in a lie of such magnitude that completely eclipsed their true self.
Welcome to the search for the authentic roots of addictions.
Alberto José Varela
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